The J Poem

Holding on

Spring time is here, the leaves are here
Committed to holding on, holding on
And even when they fall, I won't yield
I'll still be holding on, holding on.
Holding on.

I found this Dear Nora song today deep in the bowels of my mp3 archives. It's funny how certain melodies convey emotions so aptly. It doesn't even have to be the lyrics, because it's when she starts hollering that you feel stubborn, defiant, triumphant even, just holding on to whatever it is.
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I saw a quarter of Wings of Desire last Saturday. Wings of Desire won the 1987 Cannes Best Director for Wim Wenders. In 1998, Wenders made City of Angels, but it tragically pales in comparison. Wings of Desire is a poem. It opens with one, yes, but more than that, in the way the movie is shot, and the whole tone of the voice-over, you feel as if you are watching a poem. Peter Handke's Song of Childhood sets the tone:


When the child was a child
It walked with its arms swinging,
It wanted the stream to be a river,
the river a torrent,
and this puddle to be the sea.

When the child was a child,
it didn't know it was a child,
everything was full of life,
and all life was one.

When the child was a child,
it had no opinion about anything,
it had no habits,
it often sat cross-legged,
took off running,
had a cowlick in its hair,
and didn't pull a face when photographed.

And later,

When the child was a child,
It was the time of these questions:
Why am I me, and why not you?
Why am I here, and why not there?
When did time begin, and where does space end?
Isn't life under the sun just a dream?
Isn't what I see, hear and smell
just the mirage of a world before the world?
Does evil actually exist and are there people who are really evil?
How can it be that I, who I am,
wasn't before I was,
and that sometime I, the one who I am,
no longer will be the one I am?


It sounds better in German, but then it'd be a bit more difficult to understand.
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Was it a coincidence that I picked up, and read, The Bad Seed and In the Miso Soup on the same week-end? Both are about serial killers who started early on, in childhood, when most of us only have a vague idea of what murder is. It's very interesting to compare the two books though, because one is set in present-day Tokyo in the midst of the sex industry, while the other was written in the 50s, a strange novel by an equally strange author (read the preface).
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I swore I'd wait until Kill Bill Vol. 2 was on one of its last runs to see it. (I watched Vol. 1 in a virtually empty theater, just me and my Raisinets, and I loved how I was able to watch my movie in peace.) But I couldn't resist. I saw it last Saturday. The theater wasn't full as AMC was showing it in several screening rooms. What can I say. I loved it. Even though I hate Quentin Tarantino (he just loves to listen to himself talk), you can't deny the man has talent. I loved the scenes with the Chinese kung fu master, and how the camera wriggles a bit before it zooms in on the kung fu master like they do in old kung fu movies. Also, the way the film was colored and made to look like an authentic 40's detective/western/kung fu movie, depending on the story. That was cool.
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At The Body Shop, they were playing the Yeah Yeah Yeahs' Maps when I went in. This song is so oddly infectious. I waited for it to finish and ended up buying more stuff than I had planned to. (Attention market research specialists!)
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Last post in this horribly long, winding, fragmented post: I finally made it to beard papa's! [see close-ups of cream puffs and box taken by enthusiastic fan] Rocs (Firipin-jin) has been bugging me for the longest time to try it. When I got to the Upper West Side (76th and Broadway) location, there was a line forming outside the small stall, but it was definitely worth waiting in line for. Beard papa's makes the best cream puffs. It's fluffy and light, and not at all sweet. It's hard to describe; you have to try it yourself. I understand there's a branch in Manila. It is sort of expensive at $1.25 per, but it's so delicious you totally forget yourself and end up buying half a dozen even though you know it has to be eaten in 24 hours and no one is at home and you have to eat it all. I kept mine in the fridge though, and it still tastes fresh. I'm going to go back there to try the cheesecake slice things. Mmmm.