Of men and bottled water

according to this, i am a schizotypal-histrionic-avoidant-obsessive-compulsive freak. hmm, well, except for the freak part (and maybe the schizotypal and obsessive compulsive part) my entire being completely rejected the idea. until yesterday when i got my daily bottle of water from the vendo. upon returning to my desk, i discovered that for the life of me, i could not, could not open the bottle. i tried so hard. i really did. there just was no way to open it.

now, let me just mention that my sister has called me a wimp not a few times. i suck at sports or anything that involves physical strength. clearly, i had no choice but to ask a gentleman to open said bottle for me.

but the mere thought of it - of asking a guy to open a bottle for me - i just couldn't do it. it completely went against all the self-sufficiency crap that i believe in. in a job that involves the lifting of heavy boxes of paper on occasion, unless it's absolutely necessary, i don't usually ask any of the guys in the department for help. i just grunt and pretend i work at a shipyard. and this.. this.. bottle (!) had the nerve to resist.

it took me all of two hours, after a lengthy internal debate, to finally ask my fatherly seatmate to please open the bottle for me because the cap didn't have any perforations on it and even if i wiped it dry i still couldn't get a good grip. only because my throat was parched, i refused to spend another cent on that stupid vendo, and the water was getting lukewarm. even now, i can derive some satisfaction from the fact that he had a difficult time opening it, too. i almost wished he'd give up.

so, histrionic -- maybe (after all, i DO have a blog), avoidant (fear of embarrassment, etcetera) -- a little, schizotypal -- in some ways, obsessive-compulsive -- maybe more than i'm allowing myself to accept.

boy, do i have issues.

"is this a release or a build up of pressure?" - of pressure by mirah